Really? Girls this cute are online now? Fuck.
There was a day, many years ago, when I was the king of online dating. AOL, MySpace…didn’t matter: I was closing deals left and right. Fast forward to the present, where I’ve completely quit on life and have been reduced to telling tales of scoring ass off of girls with handles like “WetPet69.” Meanwhile, my good friend Rich has taken up the torch of hunting for online scooch via Match.com and OK Cupid and, sweet, merciful Christ have things changed. (Meaning it’s no longer a sea of fat girls posting pictures of themselves from the tits up with their chins stuck out to pull their multiple chins taught.) Rodriguez and I assist him in his quest for deep, meaningful relationships that last roughly 2 hours by editing his profile and showing him how to identify which girls will hop in bed with him five minutes after crying about their fathers and which will leave him waking up in a bathtub full of ice with his kidneys missing. If you’ve ever tried online dating (or just remember gross people trying to bang you on MySpace), this episode is a must-listen.
Papa’s Basement 8-7-10 (To download this file, right-click this link and select “Save Link/Target As.”)
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
crying about their fathers.. nice
very disappointed I wasn’t listening live. I would have called in to make you name drop on your high school V card swipeage found on the interwebs. bully!
maybe it’s a joke that’s just going over my head, but that ‘cute’ girl in the photo looks like a fat transvestite to me…
No, Carmen, no joke there. John just has reeeally bad taste.